Carnal Nation is proud to present Erotic Powerplay™ in Healthy Relationships, a series of videos by Dr Gabriele Hoff.
These video podcasts are interviews with articulate individuals and couples about their experiences with erotic powerplay in their relationships. In them, Dr. Hoff speaks candidly with several couples who are in powerplay relationships. The interviews explore how the couples use powerplay not as an instrument of abuse, but as a tool that builds intimacy and trust.
Madame Gina is the dominant in a same-sex Master/slave relationship. Gina and her property Mercedes live together in a beautiful home in San Francisco. How does their relationship work? How do they live together, play together? Listen to Madame Gina, as she frankly speaks about their experiences of everyday life and play.
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It didn't last
They aren't together anymore. This is not a good example of M/s.
Just because they aren't
Just because they aren't together anymore doesn't mean it's not a good example of an M/s relationship. They had known eachother for five years and were in a collared, M/s relationship for two years when this video was taken. In my humble opinion, that is enough to be a fair example of an M/s relationship. The fact that they are no longer together is a moot point.
Healthy sexuality
I got the impression that this was a relationship involving at least one intelligent, emotionally and sexually healthy woman. But I think the interview needed to include the slave's point of view as well. It's only half an interview without it.
D/s relationships...
In my opinion, D/s relationships are complex, more so than that of vanilla.
As individuals explore their passions, they evolve. This happens at a quicker pace in a D/s vs vanilla relationships. That evolution can sometimes be overwhelming or undesired by a partner.
Imagine a light being clicked on about desires so dark or deep, you may hesitate to share even if you desire to do so. Inhibitions and layers stripped away lead yet to other desires exposed. For me that is unavoidable. Then, imagine the other challenges that life has to offer: work, family, health (etc) issues woven into that life, between that of the two and those passions.
Relationships such as this take a lot of work. This requires the "two". One of that two, may be more passionate about that work, depending on their passion and energy level. Other than counseling, are their resources for the maturing D/s relationship? (If so where?) Stay in any (evolving/connected) relationship and you will be faced with challenges. Most when handled properly will bring the two closer together.
If you are tempted to engage in a BDSM relationship purely for passion/play/kink, minus a bond of deeper love: Then when needs change and differences occur, you have little incentive to remain together. Reminds me of what my mother said: "Marry for money and if finances lack you have an empty relationship.... Marry for love and if the money is gone... love will endure). In other words where there is love, there is reason to work, energize, restructure and adjust your relationship's recipe.
I wish that subject of the evolving BDSM relationship was tackled here. To find a dozen couples who love one another and are facing that challenge of evolution, and view their approaches (within a power exchange relationship) would interest me greatly. It may give others ideas for how to approach such a crossroad in their relationship!
This is a difficult subject. Other areas of life may simply require a get up and take charge agenda, very proactive in nature. That is not easily applied when a submissive partner is searching for an appropriate (sub like) way to contribute and share their concerns.
Again, VERY complex.... I wish their were more articles on this subject!
LLL